Ikea Announces Wireless Phone-Charging Furniture


charging stationIkea is evil. Yes, I buy products from them multiple times a yea,r but this doesn’t erase their evilness. What else do you call the latin incantation that they obviously place on anyone who enters their store? You lose track of space and time. Whatever your planned purchasing cap was gets destroyed. You end up teetering on the brink of divorce by the time you and your significant other make it to the register. And you find yourself at home putting together lightbulbs or sheets or something. But when I saw this reported by the BBC, I instantly forgot about their evil ways and wanted it IMMEDIATELY.

The Home Smart range will initially include lamps, bedside tables and a coffee table as well as individual charging pads for any surface.

Ikea has used the wireless charging standard QI, which is also supported by Samsung in its latest handset, the S6.

Burn in hell, Ikea. Yes, I’m buying this as soon as they release the covers supposedly being created for iPhones but still. I’m going to be putting together these ridiculous tables all over my house and will somehow end up bleeding because THAT’S WHAT HAPPENS.

Hell. Burn in it.

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Elon James White
Elon James White is a writer, satirist radio host and founder and CEO of This Week in Blackness. White has been featured on MSNBC, CNN, Huffington Post, Slate, RH Reality Check, Al Jazeera, Buzzfeed and more. White hosts the award winning & critically acclaimed TWiB! Prime on TWIB.FM Monday - Thursday at 6:30pm ET/3:30pm PT.

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