Dear Meghan McCain,

How are you? Fine, I hope. First off, I want you to know that I kind of like you–you’re plucky and free-spirited. When I see quotes from you, I don’t immediately start getting a headache upon reading it. Your stances are pretty progressive and in a party that seems to be yearning for the good ole’ days, when black people knew their place, women stayed at home and made babies, and gay people magically didn’t exist. You seem like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders despite who your dad is.

That said, I need you to do something for me: Stop talking about the oil spill being “Obama Katrina.” You’re better than that.

We were cool. Cool until I read your piece on The Daily Beast. I really didn’t think that you were one of those people. Those people, you ask? Those people who think that the president is, in fact, the messiah. Stop thinking that Obama could stop to oil spill if he wanted to. That he could walk on water, dive down a mile , and simply touch the pipe…TOUCH IT…and poof! It’s over. And that he won’t do this because he’s too busy partying with Jay-Z and Lil Wayne. You make it sound like he doesn’t care when the people that don’t care are only acting like they care now because they think this hurts Obama.

And then you wrote this, which is the part that really bugs me:

“I know Obama has made it clear that he is “furious.” He did so by stating on Larry King Live that he is “furious,” even if that fury doesn’t seem to be conveyed through his raw emotions. Still, I also know I wake up every morning with anxiety. As I and every other American watch the coasts of Florida, Mississippi, Louisiana, and Alabama as a deep cloud of oil continues to spew into the ocean, there is an extreme feeling of helplessness and anxiety. We live in weird times—I can watch, moment by moment, the destruction of my country’s coastline.”

Two things. One, I’m glad you’re worried about the coastline. We all should be. But do not hate on Obama for not flipping out and crying on TV about it. Presidents leading with “raw emotions” didn’t work out the last time something big happened here. And two, I really wish you, and everyone on TV news at the moment, would shut the f*ck up about Obama not being mad enough. I know this is a disaster and I know this is going to ruin the environment for everyone forever. But please, stop it with that. If I’m not speaking out of turn here, I’ll just say that the first black president isn’t going to get mad or have some huge emotional breakdown publicly. Sure, you may think that we’re in “post-racial America,” (Thanks, Elon) but there’s still a large amount of people (read: the Tea Party) that would flip out at the thought of the black president “getting angry.” Then the story would be “Negro President Scares America!” That’s why he isn’t leading with “raw emotion.”  Sorry, it’s the truth. Obama is a cool, smart guy. He isn’t the type to get overwrought in the first place. That’s why he’s the president and that other guy isn’t.

And a side note: you really shouldn’t bag on Obama too much since, in a roundabout way, you kind of caused this spill. “ME?!?” you say. Well, kind of. Follow my logic: You are John McCain’s daughter. John McCain supported the idiotic, catchphrase “Drill, Baby, Drill” that, kind of,  perpetuated this disaster. The “We gotta drill somewhere, and those ‘extreme greenies’ bitch and bitch about drilling onshore” attitude that people like Palin and, by proxy, your dad supports, (since he’s likely not going to come out supporting Obama on this) kind of propagated this sort of huge, ecological quagmire. Maybe that’s a little caustic, but I wouldn’t be so quick to dump all this on Obama just yet. I wrote something about this a few weeks ago, if you’re into reading it.

In closing, I’d like to say that, even though we don’t agree on this issue, I do still like you a lot. You seem like the type of person you could have a debate with and go out for milkshakes afterward without hard feelings. I don’t want to seem like everyone else that disagrees with you and calls you names. You’re a thinker. And a reader. Two things that aren’t bad in my book. Just think about some of the points I’m making, if you would.

Jared

P.S.: I wasn’t offend by your Twitter pic a few months back. People in your party are fuddy-duddies getting pissed about that. And you like Andy Warhol. Who’s mad about that?

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3. NYT: Obama Carries Uneven Record as Debater to First Contest With McCain
4. “Obama Sucks” Says White People?
5. Jack and Jill Politics: When Their Supporters Call Obama A Terrorist And Demand His Assassination, McCain And Palin Remain Silent